TOP 5 THINGS A STONER SHOULD DO FOR HIS GIRL ON VALENTINES DAY?

 Vaporizers

What's the secret of a long lasting relationship? Some people say that the keys are: trust, communication, faithfulness, and we'll add to that illustrious list a big dollop of grass.  The herb has been proven to help cement relationships between couples leading to increased bonding and affection. Now, we're not talking about you smuggling in tonnes of the plant from Cambodia to cement them bonds of affection, we're talking about you and her sharing a few puffs from the comfort of your own home. Below I've assembled a list of 10 reasons why the herb helps keep couples together.
 

STOP ARGUMENTS

The reason why the herb can stop arguments is because you'll be too damn stoned to even be bothered arguing.  Your missus might be going "nag, nag, nag"  but you wont even care. This is because the THC and CBD will be coursing through your veins like a runaway train.  Her verbal diarrhoea will be going in one ear and out the other ear quicker than you can say the word "joint".  Because in this situation all you'll be worried about will be rolling up another joint and getting another good quality hit.  So my advice to any bloke out there is- if your woman is giving out just roll up a joint, take a good drag, and let her BS blow off into the wilderness.

EATING TOGETHER CREATES BONDS

The couple that eats together stays together. Ok- so you might be getting regular munchies and gradually turning into two beached whales, but on a positive note the relationship will last.  An added bonus of eating together is that you'll also put off any sexual competition from rivals, because  who the hell wants to start a relationship with a 40 stone woman that needs a Crane to get from A to B? So get smoking, get eating, and cement that relationship to the chair, the bed, the floor, or wherever you can be an inanimate object. 

BETTER CONVERSATIONS

Everyone knows that smoking herbal can enhance your creativity and when you're creative this can lead to more productive conversations. Ok, so you might be talking some absolute garbage about your plans to take over the world, but whilst the herbs are coursing through your veins  it will seem to make sense. So my advice is to get  a big bag of herbal, start vaping it, and then begin speaking the biggest pile of garbage you can possibly imagine.

SEX

Before you start gorging on food, before you start turning into the aforementioned round bale of hay, you'll find that your sex life will be mind-blowing. It has been proven that the herbal plant can enhance the senses, and so, this leads to more mind blowing sexual encounters. If you're a real dedicated stoner you can get herbal infused oils and lubricants that you can spread over her body before you commence the dirty work.

YOU WILL BE IN THE HERE AND NOW

Lets face it, if both of you are spending all day smoking herbal the chances of you looking past the end of your nose will be negligible. Your foresight likely will be eliminated and all you'll be capable of thinking about will be the basic human necessities.  Things that will become of paramount importance will be eating, sleeping, going to the toilet, and fornicating like two horny old goats on a regular basis.  Whatever basic primitive needs are required you'll be on to them like a tonne of bricks.
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